


Snape Versus Lockhart

by Ellynne



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:13:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24131893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ellynne/pseuds/Ellynne
Summary: What was going through Snape's mind during the dueling club.
Kudos: 15





	Snape Versus Lockhart

Assistant? Did he just call me his assistant?

I am no longer a Death Eater. I am not in service to the powers of Darkness. I do not kill, torture, or maim idiots no matter what they have done to deserve it.

On the other hand, the students have a better chance of learning something useful if Lockhart can't talk.

Amazing. He flew off the stage, into the wall, and the mouth still keeps on going. It's almost as if it works completely independent of the brain. Perhaps Dumbledore couldn't get a DADA teacher this year. Perhaps this so called Lockhart is really a transformed slug.

If he was listening to what he was saying, he'd realized he's suggesting we continue the demonstration. 

Tempting.

Lockhart told me just this morning his life's ambition is to market his own line of hair care products.

He offerred me free samples of his newly invented, oily hair treatment.

I no longer torture, maim, or kill for fun. Or even when it's very richly deserved. 

But maybe when they really, really, REALLY deserve it?

The noises coming out of his mouth seem to finally have reached his brain, or maybe even an idiot like this can tell when death is staring him in the face.

Ah, well. Time to get to what really brought me here.

Mr. Potter, I want to know what you think of snakes.


End file.
